Take a look at the flyer above. Yes, this is a real flyer. That is Sasha Grey, famed porn star and also the girl that played Vinces girlfriend on Entourage. Apparently she is trying to shy away from the industry that made her famous and the TV roles have dried up so what’s the next best thing to do in 2012 when your career is possibly hitting a brick wall? Become a DJ of course!
Following in the footsteps of Paris Hilton, Joel Madden, Jermaine Dupri, Solange Knowles and Nick Cannon, Sasha Grey has taken the road many celebrities who are lost in their careers seem to take which is to buy a MacBook, some Beats headphones, clean Beatport and Hype Machine of anything popular, get booked anywhere based off their name and party rock in the house tonight! It’s that simple nowadays.
Well, since this seems to be the new thing to do, we here at Last Nights Hype wanted to keep you on the cutting edge of the industry and make sure you are on the lookout for the Top 5 Next Big Things in DJing in no specific order.
After his recent split from Katie Holmes, a lackluster musical nobody gave a shit about, and the Top Gun sequel still in development, Tom is deciding to show his range in becoming a DJ. First thing he did was sue Com Truise for stealing his namesake and took the moniker for himself. Playing numerous scientology gatherings and Oprahs birthday party where everybody was jumping on couches, things are looking promising for Maverick.
After another failed campaign at getting elected, the Ross Perot of the Republican Party has decided to take his strong hipster following and start DJing at dance parties across the country. To help himself fit in when he is not making crowds wobble, he makes it a point to go to all the local Starbucks on his all white fixed gear bike, while wearing cut off jean shorts and a newly grown awkward mustache. He keeps it long so even when he is done with his coffee he can still savor the flavor of his Venti Soy Latte.
Hulkamania is running wild, except this time its in the clubs! After a failed stint in TNA that people still don’t know about, and his ex-wife cleaning him out of basically his entire legacy, Hogan will follow in the footsteps of his failure son, Nick, and has him teach Hulkster everything he thinks he knows about DJing. Hogan opens every show with a Dubstep remix of the Derringer classic “Real American” and plays various wrestling remixes throughout his set including a Trap version of the nWo theme song, a “Voodoo Chile (Slight Return)” remix, and closes every night with a remix to his WCW theme music “American Made” complete with red and yellow confetti and circling pyro around the DJ booth.
Tired of his younger brother Charlie stealing all the spotlight after having a breakdown, Emelio decides it is time for his second (or is it third?) wind and takes on the moniker DJ Bombay and is getting booked for Junior Pee-Wee hockey games around the country. Using a duck call as his sound drop, and various Mighty Duck quotes throughout his set, look for Emelio coming to a rink near you soon.
After coming out of the closet last week, Cooper has decided to take his act to circuit parties around the world and has also become the official touring DJ for Deborah Cox. Already booked for Pride in Orlando this year and Typhoon Lagoon at next years annual Gay Days, the future looks promising for Cooper. He also has a string of remixes coming out having hooked up with famed remixer Thunderpuss featuring such artists as Lady Gaga, Whitney Houston, and Adam Lambert.
Are these top 5 a little far fetched? I wish I could say they were, because it really does seem that every day there is another celebrity out there trying to get paid to shit in peoples ears for 90 minutes.
Or make your DKTo use winter horn